Animal World Jokes

What did the dog get when he multiplied 88 x 7?The wrong answer..... More

What do you get if you sleep under a cow?A PAT on the head.Sent by Jimmy.... More

What do you call a dog with two balls and no hind legs?Sparky.... More

There was once an aspiring veterinarian who put himself through veterinary school working nights as a taxidermist. Upon graduation, he decided he could combine his two vocations to better serve the needs of his patients and their owners, while doubling his practice and, therefore, his income. He opened his own offices with a shingle on the door saying, "Dr. Jones, Veterinary Medicine and Taxidermy...... More

Did you hear about the Blind man that went Bunjee jumping?Scared the hell out of the dog..... More

Why does an elephant have four feet?Because it would look silly with six inches..... More

What do you call a dog with no back legs and balls of steel?SparkySent by Shawn.... More

This is what should happen to ALL CATS..!HOW TO WASH THE CAT1. Thoroughly clean the toilet.2. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water and have both lids up.3. Find the cat and soothe him while you carry him toward the bathroom.4. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. (You may need to stand on the lid so that he cannot escape.) The cat will self-agita...... More

How do you catch an elephant?First you dig a big hole, and fill it with wood and ash. Then you take aloadof peas and line them up around the hole. Then, when the elephant goesto take a pea, kick him in the ash-hole!.... More

An old lady owned two monkeys. One day they both died,so she took them to the taxodermist."So you want them mounted?" asked the taxidermist.To which she replied: "No. Holding hands will do just fine.".... More

What is the worst thing that can happen to a bat while it sleeps?Diarrhoea!.... More